Funny That

I went to visit my cousin and her new baby girl in the hospital today. As expected, it brought back my yearning for a baby.

Unexpectedly, it was not holding the baby that did it. Not snuggling the baby that did it. Not even the sweet siren song of those first couple days holed up in the hospital recreating your family that did it.

I am reminded of my yearning for a baby not because of the baby I visited, but because of what my cousin told me. That while she was in labor, riding to the hospital, with her bag of water leaking all over, she was on the phone with her big sister. And her big sister kept making her laugh.

I am reminded just how much I want that for Ezra. Someone to belong to.

Decision Making

Okay internet, I might need you to weigh in on this one. I am considering applying for a full-time job. Realistically, I don't have much chance of getting it. I have the minimum requirements and not much else. But it's a great job. I'd love to have it.

The problem is, I don't know that my clan is ready for me to work full-time, outside the home. I really believe that a lot of the reason that Ezra is so well adjusted and intelligent is that I've been able to stay home with him and foster his interests. Of course, the same week that I am getting my resume in order, he got sick and has been home the last two days, which brings up a host of other issues to address, like childcare.

So, the problem lays out like this: Is it worth what I view as a major sacrifice on the part of my husband and child for me to go work full time at a totally freaking badass job? I admit that I am bored in my current situation. But, Ezra will only be little for a little while longer, and I have like, 40 more years to work.

*sigh* Tough decision. I should also note: If I go for it, and they do offer me the job, I will almost certainly take it. It's a matter of do I toss my hat in the ring, knowing that I will take it if offered?

Where Do We Go From Here?

The Naked Words show was amazing! We had approximately 138 guests, and are told that it is the largest turn-out for an event like this that the Carnegie Center has ever had! People were standing everywhere, sitting everywhere, the crowd bled out the door. We made them laugh, we made them cry. They gave us a standing ovation, and lovely, touching words of gratitude. We reached out to 138 people, and made a difference. A difference in peoples' perspectives, a difference in how people feel about themselves and their body issues. We made a difference in ourselves and how we feel.

The strange thing is- none of us seems to feel done with this project. We are all wondering, where do we go from here? We are thinking that it may be time to start packing our bags and taking it on the road. So, if anybody has ideas for good venues, please leave comments or email me.

We are sisters in Naked Words, and we might not be ready to let go. We are certainly not letting go of each other. These amazing women who sat behind me while I told my story, who I could feel rooting for me, supporting me, sending me strength and good thoughts the entire time I spoke. I hope they could feel me doing the same for them.

Thanks to all who came, who listened, who sat in that hot room and forgot that they were hot. Thanks to all who cried, and who laughed, and who stood up and applauded. Thanks to all who could not be there, but sent us sweet words of encouragement and thought of us the whole time. We felt your thoughts, your strength, your love too. Thanks to those who partied with us afterword, and repeatedly told us how great it was. How we moved you, changed you, fed your souls. Thanks to Donna Ison for putting this together, getting the grant, telling us a billion times that our words are wonderful and that we wouldn't fall on the waxed floor and embarrass ourselves. Thanks to Theo Edmonds for coming from NYC to decorate our after-party with amazing artwork, and allowing us to use Pork Chops and Applesauce (is that the real name of the painting? What is the actual title?) as our poster art.

Thank you Naked Sisters for having my back.

Naked Time

This evening, at the Carnegie Center in Lexington, KY, I have the honor of being one voice in a group of women talking openly and honestly about our body issues. I have read the entire script, and listened to many of these women read their original monologues. While most of us are not actors, this project has made brilliant writers out of all of us.

The show is at 7 p.m., admission is free. I hope to see many of you there. I am a nervous wreck right now, trying to get ready and the only part of me that is put together right now are my toes, thanks to the lovely lady at the nail salon. I know this: even if I fall on my ass in front of everybody, this show is still going to be great!

Also, at 5:30, several of my friends and my Mom will be enjoying dinner at Atomic Cafe-- all are welcome there, I like to think of it as my own little fan club ;)

-The Flaming Maiden out

(original artwork by Theo Edmonds, thank you Theo for contributing to our project!)

Memorial Day Weekend

This weekend, Chris moved a few tons of landscaping bricks, and together we moved about 4 tons of dirt and compost. We turned ourback yard from this:

To this:

That bed is where we will grow our own organic veggies for the summer. I think I'm going to need to learn how to can.

Let summer begin!

(No really, I'm tired of this school year and am ready to have my kid back-- Let Summer Begin!)